Table topics about Christmas Music

I was table topics master for the last meeting before Christmas. Here are my topics based on the theme of Christmas Music.

  1. In 1975 Greg Lake released the song “I believe in Father Christmas”. Despite all the evidence, why do you still believe in Father Christmas?
  2. Between 1647 and 1660 Oliver Cromwell banned Christmas including all Christmas Carols and feasting. Why do you think we should ban Christmas?
  3. In 1984 Wham! reached number two in the UK chart with the song Last Christmas, which included the lyrics “Last Christmas I gave you my heart, but the very next day you gave it away”. Who will you be giving your heart to this year?
  4. In the Christmas of 2000 Bob the builder reached the number one spot with the song “Can we fix it?” Tell us about a time when you fixed something.
  5. In his 1988 song, Mistletoe & Wine, Cliff Richard described Christmas as “A time for giving, a time for getting”. Tell us about an interesting Christmas present that you’ve given or received.
  6. Sir Cliff Richard has had three Christmas number ones. But more impressively his 2010 calender was the topselling calendar of a male celebrity last year, beating Justin Beiber and Peter Andre. What celebrity do you want on your 2011 calendar?
  7. In 2009 the Rage Against The Machine got the Christmas number one with their song “Killing In The Name” seventeen years after it was originally released. What song from the past would you like to see re-released and become Christmas no.1?
  8. The 1993 song “Mr Blobby” by Mr Blobby. Voted the most annoying Christmas #1 in a poll by HMV. What kind of music do you find annoying?
  9. X-factor has dominated the Christmas no.1 slot for the past few years. What would you do if you had as much money as Simon Cowell?
  10. On Christmas eve 1914 French, English and German troops simultaneously sung the carol Silent Night during the Christmas truce. Tell us about a time you made a truce.
  11. In 1974 Mud had a Christmas number one with the song “Lonely this Christmas”. Tell us about a time when you had a lonely Christmas.
  12. The 1945 song, Let it snow, features the lyrics “Oh the weather outside is frightful, but the fire is so delightful, and since we’ve no place to go, let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.” Do you think the UK can cope with more snow fall over Christmas?
  13. In his Christmas song, White Wine in the sun, the comedian Tim Minchen sings the lyrics: “And yes, I have all of the usual objections to consumerism; The commercialisation of an ancient religion; And the westernisation of a dead Palestinian; Press-ganged into selling Playstations and beer”. Do you think Christmas has become too commercial?

It was a great high energy session with many references to Cliff Richard.

Merry Christmas!

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Link Roundup: September

Activity on the naked speaker has been minimal over the last few months. But I have been busy. I have completed two speeches including a humorous contest winner and my tenth speech at toastmasters. I finished my series about how to write jokes. I’ve also been keeping reports of any stand up comedy gigs I do here (not on this blog).

I’ve also collected some quality links from around the web. As usual they are obliquely related to public speaking and include podcasts/videos/articles about: story telling, marketing, performance and becoming successful…

This American Life: The right to remain silent

I am consistently amazed at the quality of story telling on the radio show This American Life. The second story in this hour long show has all the drama and suspense of a Hollywood movie.

Six Principles of Sticky ideas

A large excerpt from the book Made to Stick by Dan Heath and Chip Heath includes the key principles for creating a “sticky” idea

  • Simplicity: “We must be masters of exclusion. We must relentlessly prioritize. […] Proverbs are the ideal. We must create ideas that are both simple and profound. The Golden Rule is the ultimate model of simplicity: a one-sentence statement so profound that an individual could spend a lifetime learning to follow it.”
  • Unexpectedness: “We need to violate people’s expectations. We need to be counterintuitive. […] For our idea to endure, we must generate interest and curiosity. […] We can engage people’s curiosity over a long period of time by systematically “opening gaps” in their knowledge — and then filling those gaps.”
  • Concreteness: “We must explain our ideas in terms of human actions, in terms of sensory information.”
  • Credibility: “Sticky ideas have to carry their own credentials. We need ways to help people test our ideas for themselves — a ‘try before you buy’ philosophy for the world of ideas.”
  • Emotions: “How do we get people to care about our ideas? We make them feel something. […] We are wired to feel things for people, not for abstractions.”
  • Stories: “How do we get people to act on our ideas? We tell stories. […] Research shows that mentally rehearsing a situation helps us perform better when we encounter that situation in the physical environment. Similarly, hearing stories acts as a kind of mental flight simulator, preparing us to respond more quickly and effectively.”

Via LoneGunman

Penn Jillette on Big Think

Penn Jillette is one half of the magic duo Penn and Teller. He claims to have spent more time on stage than any other performer. He has some interesting things to say about performance preparation and a lot to say about rational thought. Watch the embedded video, or go to the BigThink website to use chapter selection.

(Watch this 54:38 video on BigThink)

Malcom Gladwell on RadioLab

Are geniuses born or created? In his book Ouliers, Malcom Gladwell claims they are created. And in this audio interview, for Radiolab, he explains his theory.

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Writing for stand up part 3: Refining Jokes

If you read the last two articles in this series you may have written something that resembles a joke. If you’re still at the ideas stage try fitting one into the setup/punch format discussed earlier. Don’t worry if it doesn’t seem very funny. We’ll try and whip it into shape.

The process of refining an idea into joke is difficult. It requires logic and a creativity. It’s like trying to fill in a blank sudoku grid with beautiful calligraphy, and never being sure if the numbers can ever line up.

But there are techniques and and rules of thumb that can help you. First and most importantly…

Get Audience Feedback

You will only know if a joke is funny if you try it out on people.

Some people will drop their jokes into conversations with friends to see if they hit. I dislike this practice. It’s unnatural to interrupt a conversation with a clearly prewritten joke, delivered with comic timing, and a little pause at the end where the teller makes a mental note of who laughed.

I think it’s better to let your friends know that you have a few jokes you’d like to try out or, even better, find a group of other comedy writers/performers to bounce ideas off.

But this can only take you so far. At some stage you will have to try your stuff out infront of a real audience. This can be brutal. Or it can be fantastic. But it’s never ambiguous. The audience laughs or they don’t. The joke is funny or it’s not. It’s important not to take this personally. It’s all part of the writing process. Jokes that continually get laughs are solid. Jokes that don’t get laughs need to be worked on or discarded. Use the audience response as feedback to focus your writing effort.

Comedians will often record their set and listen back paying attention to the audience’s reaction. Little mistakes, improvisations or adjustments to timings may completely change the audience’s reaction. Quality improvisations can be incorporated into the joke allowing it to improve and grow.

This process of evolving material is beautifully described, in this performance by Baba Brinkman. (I was in the audience when this was filmed. It gave me goosebumps.)


(Watch this 4:35 video on Youtube)

Attention to audience feedback and allowing your joke to grow, really is the most important part of joke writing. This annoying if you’re a perfectionist or if you’re or doing something one-off like a best man speech.

But don’t worry. There are plenty of rules of thumb that can help enhance your joke from the comfort of your armchair.

Rules of Thumb

Be Brief

Get to the funny, ASAP.

Be Specific

When you’re specific you create a more vivid image in the audience’s mind. “My mate Dave told me..” is usually better than “People tell me..” Furthermore vivid imagery brings a whole load of new assumptions which could potentially be used as the basis for more jokes.

Punch at the end

The audience will probably “get” the joke at some point during the punch line. Ideally you want this point to be the very last word, otherwise you’ll still be speaking when they’re laughing (or worse, they’ll suppress their laughter to let you finish).

Exaggerate

Make your emotional reactions more extreme. Make the conditions worse.

Use funny words

Some words are funnier than others. According to this list, “dipthong” is the funniest word.

Tags/Afterthoughts

If you’ve managed to write a joke that gets a laugh, well done! But we’re not finished yet. We can probably squeeze a few more laughs out of it by adding additional punchlines also known as Tags or Afterthoughts.

Here’s one of my jokes:

My mum gets me rubbish Christmas presents. Things like Eau de Toilette. Never Obsession by Calvin Klein. It’s always Indifference by Superdrug. Or Effluence by Poundland.

The main punchline is “Indifference by Superdrug”. That always gets a laugh. Then I get another laugh with “Or Effluence by Poundland”. This second punchline didn’t require any additional setup, it was just tacked onto the end of an existing joke. Tags/afterthoughts might restate of the same joke in a new way, or they could take the joke in new directions by subverting other assumptions present in either the setup or the previous punchline. I could potentially add many more tags/afterthoughts to this joke.

The major advantage of tags/afterthoughts is that the lack of additional setup allows you to fit many more laughs into a shorter space of time, allowing you to build up a momentum of laughter.

In the following example from 90s Comedian, Stewart Lee has just described a gratuitously vulgar scene, and now he’s mocking the audience reaction. He gets seven laughs off a single setup:

‘You’ve broken that bond of trust. Because we weren’t expecting to be made to visualise that image. There was no warning of this, it wasn’t flagged up …

It’s like fingering someone on the first date, [laugh]

you wouldn’t do it. [laugh]

Even at arm’s length, [laugh]

wearing a mitten [laugh]

through the shattered window of a rural bus shelter [laugh]

at the end of an otherwise pleasant evening, [laugh]

as an inappropriate gesture of thanks. [laugh]

You wouldn’t do that, Stew, so why are you doing this? Why? Why?’

Moving Forward

In this series we’ve looked at the structure of jokes, examined how to generate funny ideas, and how to refine those ideas into jokes that get laughs. This is the end of our examination of jokes as individual units. In a future series I plan to cover how to build a stand-up comedy routine or humorous speech.

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